I feel i’m just my trauma, not a person
2024.11.27 00:40 pittedcherries I feel i’m just my trauma, not a person
I’m not gonna in depth about my trauma because I don’t feel comfortable to. But my whole life is just trauma. I can’t really feel happiness without that odd feeling of “it seems good right now but it’s gonna be real bad”. I want to be more than my trauma but it seems impossible to.
Another thing, I started to do behaviors that the people who gave me the trauma do. I lost almost my entire last online friend group because of this, and I don’t blame them I was a complete and total asshole, if not more than that. I wish that maybe if my trauma wasn’t behind it all… but i can’t think of an un traumatized me, that’s how bad it gotten.
“I wish I wish I wish” is something i keep telling myself because of this, but i know i can’t go back, i know that there’s nothing i can do except live with it.
Clarifications: I’m autistic and I’m in therapy but it’s super ineffective because i can’t trust my therapist.
submitted by pittedcherries to Vent [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 Zeranvor German Foreign Policy: A Seminar
 | Background: This will be my first effortpost in this community, so please be patient with any formatting errors or grammar mistakes. This is also working under the assumption that the respective administration has carte blanch to send troops to any conflict at any time. Also, feel free to come up with your own reasoning as to why some things could be changed or if I missed anything important. Main guiding principle: "Anyone but the Reds!" The format will be as follows: ConflictRationale: ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Prior to Schleicher taking over, this is probably the best combination of focuses/focusi under Master of the World. It ensures that the money printer in the East remains strong and gives some aid to the Ottomans during a hectic time [Black Monday]. Also, Treaty of Metz allows you to see if the Syndies are going to behave or be sussy bakas. Lastly, you don't want to spend too much time here as you need to tackle the ongoing political and economic crisis. https://preview.redd.it/t744kkppib3e1.png?width=1754&format=png&auto=webp&s=7cf965ffb3e7c5b46a1540124c48f1078378e6b5 ChinaNanjing Clique obviously, they're the most pro-German warlord and ensures a counterweight to any pro-Japanese or pro-Internationale influence in East Asia. Beautiful... Baltic PartisansI think the top option sums it up the best, the last thing you need during Germany's darkest hour is a quarter of the Ostwall vanishing overnight. Full support! https://preview.redd.it/bcripsebjb3e1.png?width=740&format=png&auto=webp&s=f1c7c7472455a6b696288601f19249b3cfa73af3 Ukraine instabilitySame thing as the Baltics, the last thing Germany needs is half of the Ostwall disappearing or Gott bewahre joining the Russians. Full support! https://preview.redd.it/a7pelwkwkb3e1.png?width=736&format=png&auto=webp&s=eff43e128112df85fd8962502ea9f509c5e9a48f IrelandIreland is an interesting case, it could be a valuable staging ground for incursions into British waters and raids into the Home Isles. However, it'll prove incredibly hard to defend considering how the navies of UoB and CoF dwarf the High Seas Fleet. If Ireland is actively pushing itself into the arms of the Reds, then just consider it a lost cause. It's not worth the investment that could be used for other areas. https://preview.redd.it/mlxaiq1olb3e1.png?width=666&format=png&auto=webp&s=e69c9794528d149f29fe85a345a26f9d92f7175b BulgariaBulgaria is also an interesting case, because it can either be very pro-German or very pro-Russian [Zveno], if it's the latter, just kinda let it die. If not, then make sure to give it enough support to win against the Belgrade Pact. Spanish Civil WarHere's where the most controversy will probably arise: I actually think the Carlists and NOT the Kingdom should be supported. This is due to the fact that the Kingdom of Spain actually has a strong isolationist presence and can end up being completely neutral whereas the Carlists are guaranteed to be a second front for the CoF to fight. https://preview.redd.it/3yj58y01nb3e1.png?width=958&format=png&auto=webp&s=cbc37380d1c66fecbbfae5bd110f11135c90ded2 Booooo, all my homies hate the Kingdom War of Arabian UnificationAnything that is pro-Ottoman is pro-German and since Jabal Shammar is the Ottoman puppet in that region, make sure they win. https://preview.redd.it/2qhi3k20pb3e1.jpg?width=1275&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=86c05fbcac635706414ec9c0f6f95e8acfe03203 American Civil WarAnother possibly controversial choice, but I think the Federalists/MacArthur should be supported over the Longists. This is because they're typically in the best position to knock out the Syndies before they ramp up production. Not only that, if the Feds can ensure that the CSA has no access to the sea, that means no access to any lend lease or Internationale support. Hungarian Civil WarDoes this even need to be explained? Austria is Germany's natural ally, anything that hurts them hurts you. In an interesting parallel to 1848, German troops instead of Russians will be marching across mountains to ensure the stability of the Habsburgs. https://preview.redd.it/zcbsftamqb3e1.png?width=1157&format=png&auto=webp&s=65e5862639f6547c425c21f26eb02122cff359c8 Indian Civil WarRemember: Anyone but the Reds. Aid should be sent to both the Dominion and Princely Federation. However, once the Bharatiya Commune has been eliminated, who should be helped? Believe it or not, the Dominion should be, because unlike the Princely Federation, the Dominion is solidly in the Entente faction. The Princely States can become a nightmare if they end up joining the Moscow Accord or Co-Prosperity Sphere. Now, you can get lucky and they join the Reichspakt but that is too much of a gamble. https://preview.redd.it/hqujoqxnsb3e1.png?width=910&format=png&auto=webp&s=41549b19b8658196fe639573e04635811bf84acc Argentinian Civil WarArgentina can only join the Reichspakt if Carles isn't in power, but the most important thing Argentina does for Germany is the unfair trade treaty that German secures in the first few months. A victorious Argentina means a strong German economy and one/two less members of the Internationale. https://preview.redd.it/0ey7s3oytb3e1.png?width=400&format=png&auto=webp&s=6e691100504ede6e45d8bbb0e3ab5c905e354c25 https://preview.redd.it/nsjjm6aqtb3e1.png?width=667&format=png&auto=webp&s=fd36f00ff46c6e277c7a9e7fc0ad522a856952a7 Italian Civil WarAe you sick of hearing Anyone but the Reds? Unfortunately for you, that rationale applies here too; it doesn't matter if you have super anti-Austrian/German regimes in both Sicily and Venice, they are much more preferable than a unified Red Italy. https://preview.redd.it/k9kbehbiub3e1.png?width=612&format=png&auto=webp&s=ff4cac2f23f45bc8d2964b54c1dbd8145fc5ea99 Haitian-Dominican WarFor some reason, Haiti really loves Germany, so if you help them beat the DR, you can get a small but noteworthy ally in the Caribbean. https://preview.redd.it/ugdznybq0c3e1.png?width=819&format=png&auto=webp&s=81e425e48e0777c082d1a2717e8625fe974b453a Desert WarIf the Ottomans can win against the Cairo Pact prior to WK2 and Germany "settles disputes with the Ottoman Empire," the Reichspakt gets a bulwark in the East to defend the Caucasus and attack into Central Asia. This stretches the Russians to the breaking point as now they have to defend against the Finnish front, the Baltic front, the Belarussian front, the Ukrainian front, the Caucasus front, and now the Central Asian front. The Ottomans are probably the most important ally for Germany. https://preview.redd.it/zgcc0j1f4c3e1.png?width=452&format=png&auto=webp&s=6e659dc61feed4020037fdffd3546b7a12ed820c https://preview.redd.it/1b18vi294c3e1.png?width=1126&format=png&auto=webp&s=64312ffef2c9f123552d6b59f9283a77288bf89d This is as close as you can get to the ideal scenario in 1940. Other than France and Britain, the only other members of the Internationale: Mexico and Hawaii. https://preview.redd.it/bjp3n1labc3e1.png?width=1498&format=png&auto=webp&s=261f835ade7274aa1c14019ad7a61f6b07188060 So yeah, I'd love to hear any comments on if you make the same choices or even more importantly, if you do anything different! Mfw my only allies are thousands of km away and French submitted by Zeranvor to Kaiserreich [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 littlezappa Webull Canada Referral Code - Sign up and get a $50 to $100 Bonus when you fund 100+ 🍁
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2024.11.27 00:40 SrLuquitas la imposible?
 | submitted by SrLuquitas to independiente1905 [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 Clowdtail12 SoC Coop Discord server?
Does the SoC coop discord server still exist? All of the invite links that I found are dead, and I was hoping to try it out with some of my friends.
submitted by Clowdtail12 to stalker [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 MartianMaterial [AskaPol] Sen. Kaine on UAPs over Langley AFB: “We will be taking it up in the NDAA"
![[AskaPol] Sen. Kaine on UAPs over Langley AFB: “We will be taking it up in the NDAA](https://external-preview.redd.it/ztBedYAGkasb-lDnZp3NJzpstkL0I9godirGMroDf8A.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=5ac36ef95c9b14b0815a159c96e85f9de228f85d "[AskaPol] Sen. Kaine on UAPs over Langley AFB: “We will be taking it up in the NDAA") | submitted by MartianMaterial to disclosureparty [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 Curious-Message-6946 ELIC: What happened to Hoops & Yoyo?
submitted by Curious-Message-6946 to ExplainLikeImCalvin [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 CiprianiG Does anyone else have duplicated events in their calendar app?
Events are being duplicated multiple times, but they all seem to come from the same Outlook account. For example, holidays like "Christmas" are showing up eight times, even though they are only listed once in my Outlook calendar when I check on Outlook.live.com.
This only happens in the Samsung Calendar app—everything looks fine when I view my calendar directly in Outlook. It seems like the app is syncing the same calendar multiple times, which makes everything look cluttered and hard to manage.
Has anyone else faced this problem? Is there a fix for this issue specifically in the Samsung Calendar app? I’m using a galaxy s24 ultra
Thanks for any help or advice!
submitted by CiprianiG to S24Ultra [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 wewdwtnizrub Scribd Black Friday 2024 Promo Code
Here is the Scribd Black Friday 2024 Promo Code
Discover Discounts: Up to 90% Off Scribd Items in November 2024!
submitted by wewdwtnizrub to YoursCoupea [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 KSDawgOfficial Context: someone she didnt know texted her) she gets it from me :3
 | submitted by KSDawgOfficial to TeenagersButBetter [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 HonestElk2525 Way to play that one off…
 | For educational purposes only. submitted by HonestElk2525 to tayhotrish [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 Melodic-Vanilla9128 35M Looking to make some new female friends!
Hey! I am 35 from the USA. Lately I've realized I don't really have any female friends. I've been talking to a few women on here lately though and I have really enjoyed it. So I would like to meet some new people and hopefully make some new friends. Age isn't really a big deal, but it would be nice if you were somewhat close. Also it doesn't matter if you are single or married. Just looking for some friends.
Most of my hobbies are outdoor related. It would be cool if you were the same, but if not its still fun to learn other peoples hobbies and interests!
I look forward to hearing from you!
submitted by Melodic-Vanilla9128 to MakeNewFriendsHere [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 babygaga84 Sanrio BAB for sale
 | Three Sanrio build a bears for sale! All brand new! Was displayed! Prices doesn't include shipping! US ONLY! PayPal (with fee) only
submitted by babygaga84 to buildabearBST [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 Dry_Temporary_6175 Every day, I feel like a walking zombie with no control over myself. Does anyone know what can cause this?
Hello everyone. Lately, I don't know what the hell is wrong with me at all. I just feel something has left me. One day, I was thinking about some stressful thoughts about me feeling like a worthless human being for being so incompetent in life and it felt like I mentally broke for some reason. I felt immense shame and then this happened suddenly. I don't know exactly what is wrong with me for sure but it feels like something left me. My very essence of morality and what is right or wrong has just left me. It's like some type of entity or being is taking over my body and possessing my soul, making me to do and think things that I don't normally think. It's like it's controlling my very essence and mind and state of my being or something. I don't make certain decisions on time and when people are talking to me, I feel out of touch. I don't respond immediately. My thought process and my normal way of thinking about things are severely distorted in a way that I don't normally think of thing in the same way of how it is.
I feel like my mind is way too confused and I can't form coherent thoughts and make real decisions except the same basic routines that I always do everyday and all the time. It's like I can't form new ideas and decisions to make or even have a free conscious of choice and thought. I also can't feel things strongly like I used to. I really can't feel good dopamine or even cheap pleasure like I used to in the past. I feel way too numb to things and even fear, when I am in serious danger sometimes. I can feel very little ounces of pleasure and satisfaction. It's crazy that this is happening. I feel like doing the first thing that comes to my mind all the time without second thought but then later, my senses come back to me. It's like I am stuck in some trance and I do it immediately, without second thought and then my normal regular self starts to reflect on it. It's like I can't think twice at once, which makes no damn sense. When things are shocking or unexpected, it doesn't phase me anymore.
I feel like something is seriously disconnected from me or that I am losing some kind of sense with what is going on with me in my mindset. It's like I have the opposite desires and the opposite feelings to what I feel. This all started on November 14th, and intensified to a greater level. I don't know what to do and why this keeps getting worse. I feel like I am someone else and thinking their own thoughts and having their identity and then the next time, I am myself but only operating on a very small conscious version of who I really am. Can someone help me?
submitted by Dry_Temporary_6175 to mentalhealth [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 darkmagedtm A haul from the sleepy town of Niagara Falls, NY when it isn't tourist season
 | submitted by darkmagedtm to WhiskeyTribe [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 bot_olini La fórmula Salinas: el libro que expone a las redes del poder en México
 | submitted by bot_olini to mexico_politics [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 Rainbow-Catcher Time to lesson 3
“No time to explain Kruber-you must learn golden ratio spin !”
submitted by Rainbow-Catcher to Vermintide [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 Omar_Town Game keeps disconnecting. What should I do?
game keeps disconnecting from the server. I login just fine but as soon as I hit play game. Character starts falling and after a minute or so, it says disconnected from server. It just keeps happening. No other game is causing any issue. Any idea what’s going on??
I have tried deleting the game and downloading it again. It still doesn’t help.
submitted by Omar_Town to FallGuysGame [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 butter-lee 제가 개인적으로 제일 좋아하는...
2024.11.27 00:40 Extra_Dragonfly5153 F18 make me a porn addicted slut plsss 0509df98988dd56a755bd353a265f7e659fd26843e766ba269ce3dde18efac8d05
submitted by Extra_Dragonfly5153 to Snapchatgerman [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 Lumenor_Prince Wich size simce good ?
 | Hi i want some help for this The first picture with the forest green band is a 44mm and a band m/l The second picture with cream band is a 40mm and s/m band. Trying the two the cream one don't let me more room to attache it. Its is a bit tight. The green one is much more loose and confortable. So i don't know if a go with the 40mm and search for a larger band or go with the 44mm. submitted by Lumenor_Prince to GalaxyWatch [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 ironjimmy6a Custom metal signs, shipping available Dm me.
 | submitted by ironjimmy6a to Ironworker [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 Heavy-Emergency-8782 Aoph Fox $FOX
 | https://pump.fun/coin/8n7BzKcPqD6u9tn1iEpnk579R2enMWBvKr1maNu8pump submitted by Heavy-Emergency-8782 to pumpfun [link] [comments] |
2024.11.27 00:40 cup_quake16 lf someone to play with
nac
terrible plat 1
goal radiant
highschool senior
disc ibiduadieu
submitted by cup_quake16 to Valorant_LFG [link] [comments]
2024.11.27 00:40 Jamal2939 101 Dalmatians The Series Intro
 | submitted by Jamal2939 to stripe [link] [comments] |