My boyfriend disappeared after my "friend" sabotaged my life, and I don’t know how to fix it
2024.11.30 01:40 East_Television4956 My boyfriend disappeared after my "friend" sabotaged my life, and I don’t know how to fix it
I (26F) feel like my life has been ripped apart, and I don’t know how to move forward. My boyfriend (26M) of almost two years disappeared without a trace after I came back from a trip with my friends. We were serious, like talking about moving in together, maybe even getting engaged soon serious. He’s the kind of guy who plans ahead, keeps his promises, and takes commitment seriously.
We met at work, and I’ve never felt more at ease with someone. He’s introverted and thoughtful, always making me feel cared for in the smallest ways like remembering my favorite snack or taking over chores when I was too tired. He’s a private person, careful with who he lets into his world, but with me, he was always open and honest.
The last time we spoke in person, we had a small disagreement about Thanksgiving plans. He wanted to spend it with his family, and I wanted to spend it with mine. It wasn’t a fight, just a difference we planned to resolve when I got back. During my trip, we stayed in constant touch. I’d text him throughout the day, call him at night, and everything seemed normal.
On the third day of the trip, I suddenly couldn’t reach him. My texts didn’t go through, my calls went straight to voicemail, it was like his phone had been turned off.
I was immediately worried but tried not to overreact. I thought maybe it was a network issue or that his phone had died or maybe even he got upset because of disagreement. But when I couldn’t reach him after two days, I cut my trip short and came home early, worried something was wrong. That’s when I found out he’d completely disappeared.
None of his friends or family knew where he was. The only person who seemed to know anything was his mom, who told me he was “fine” but refused to say more. I was devastated. I couldn’t understand what had happened or why he’d suddenly shut me out.
Then, one of the “friends” I went on the trip with smugly admitted what she’d done. During the trip, there was one night we went out partying. We didn't drink much and came back to hotel before 11PM. I left my phone in the hotel, but when I came back the next morning, I couldn’t find it. I was panicked for hours until I eventually found it under the bed, which was strange because I hadn’t left it there. At the time, I thought I was just being forgetful because I’d had a few drinks.
But now I know what really happened. My “friend” had gone thought my phone while I was out. She used it to message my boyfriend, pretending to be me, and made it sound like I was cheating on him and wants to break up. She told me my boyfriend was shocked when he got the messages. She said he called multiple times, begging “me” to explain. She pretended to ignore him for a while before finally answering and saying she didn’t want to hear from him anymore. She said he still struggled, saying things like, “We’ll talk when you get back,” and “This doesn’t make sense.” Then she laughed and said, “But that video really shut him up good.” Then she sent him an old intimate video of me and my ex. I didn’t even have that video anymore. I’d changed phones months ago, and it wasn’t something I kept. I remember regretting making that video as soon as it happened. I told my ex to delete it, and he swore he did. But I guess he lied, and my “friend” got it from him in her words "for a price". She admitted she’d been saving it, waiting for the “right moment.” She said she thought my boyfriend was “too good for me” and wanted to “test him” by sending it.
I can’t even begin to describe how hearing that made me feel. It’s like she took pleasure in watching him break. I feel gutted every time I think about those words. My boyfriend is the kind of person who overthinks everything, who would’ve replayed that video in his head over and over, probably convincing himself that I’d lied to him the whole time. He must be crushed. I keep imagining him sitting alone, spiraling, and my heart breaks for him. I hate that he was put through that pain.
When I got my phone back that day, there was no trace of the messages or the video. She had deleted everything so I wouldn’t notice.
I’ve spent the past month searching for him relentlessly, but I haven’t been able to find any leads. None of his close friends know anything, and his mom won’t say more than that he’s okay. I’ve been combing through every possible connection, desperate to figure out where he went.
Yesterday, an old coworker of us mentioned that he might have gotten a job at their competitor in another state. It’s the first solid lead I’ve had since this nightmare began, and I’m planning to fly there next week to see if I can find him. I don’t even know what I’ll say if I do. All I want is for him to know the truth—that I didn’t betray him and that this was all a sick, cruel lie. But part of me is terrified that it’s already too late, that he won’t believe me or won’t even want to see me.
Thank you for reading this far. I just needed to get it out because I feel like my life is crumbling, and I don’t know what else to do.
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