I wanted to die...I wish i was never born.

2025.02.01 19:01 daryl5921 I wanted to die...I wish i was never born.

I'm 19 years old now. I was the one of the brightest kid in my area and I always gave my parents result. They were always proud of me. I cleared exam and joined one of the best school of india [won't take name for privacy reason]. I was the one of the best guy in school ..good in academics, sports, cocurricular and everything. Life turned out after Covid Came. Actually My eldest sister whom i still love the most got married in 2018. Later we came to know that her husband has an extra marrital affair and he used to beat my sister used to drag her by her hair and all. I was unaware of all this because I used to live in hostel far away from my home (2500km) and they didn't use to tell me anything. After all I was just a 13-14year old kid. I came back at home in Covid and when stayed then found out everything about my sister. How she's being treated in her laws home. She wasn't allowed to use mobile phones. There were time limitations which was used by her 1yr old daughter. Parental locks always on. She can't even talk to anyone even her own home and every call was being recorded. I don't know how she spent complete lockdown in a small room without phone or anything. She must have been through a lot and all i can imagine only. So let's take it very short. After knowing all this I decided to leave one of the best schools in my main year [11th and 12th ] which could have changed my life. I told my parents that waha padhai achhi nahi hoti hai [they still don't know the main reason]. So i left thinking to bring back my sister home but only after few months She poisoned herself leaving her 20days old son and 1.5y old daughter. In this everyone is equally responsible from my parents to She herself. and it happened in 2021 when i was in 11th class. Idk why things affect me late so whole 2021 i was fine jaise kuchh hua hi nahi ho but in 2022 i started to feel her absence. I started to go into depression. I started to soend time alone. All day in a room. Midnight suddenly woke and started to cry and all....not talking much and in 2023 my board came but i couldn't study anything because of depression still i don't know how CBSE passed me with MATHS 27, PHY 23, CHEM23. After board i was sure I'm failing so ran away from home. Whole 2023 went into depression . I started to live alone in delhi and getting panic attacks. Shock..anxiety attack. I used to stay in my room only. Stayed there 4 months but don't even know my neighbors name. Suddenly i used to cry and all of sudden laugh like nothing happened. Went weeks without eating. Suicidal thoughts started coming. I WENT FOR SUICIDE TO JUMP FROM 8TH FLOOR. Almost jump but idk why i just returned. I came back home but didn't work. I took 1 year drop to heal myself with family [they are still unaware of all this] but didn't work. Then in 2024 i gave JEE in family pressure but obviously got 16 and 30 percentile. Papa didn't allow me for CUET as he doesn't know what a cuet is. I went for NDA exam 5 attempt but couldn't clear. Later i had no option left except to get admission in BA in local college where they even don't complete course on time. Now my parents want to go and any constable or group D exam and join it because they want to boast in front of so called society but all i want from them 4 years. Let my graduation complete and i want to sit in graduation level exam and I'll clear it but they don't even wanna listen me. Due to all this every time we use to have argument and fight at home. I'm fed up from this...again i want to die. I wish i was never born. I LITERALLY FAILED AS A BROTHER, STILL TRYING TO PROVE A WORTHY SON and Yeah I don't have friends so ig i failed in that too. Everytime i just get taunt from my parents that Haath se Nikal gaya hai. Baato me nahi hai. Pata nahi kya kya i can't even write but i gave them the best result, unka harek baat manta hu. They think that i enjoy, rupye udata hu, awaragardi karta hu but literally i save their money every possible way and think about them. When i see other kid i think I'm too good but still pheww I'm literally fed up. As a only middle class son I'm tired of carrying everyone's hope and responsibilities. I'm out of energy. I want to sleep. A sleep that can last forever.
I'M DONE
THANK YOU GUYS
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2025.02.01 19:01 farbspiel "Forest Creature #3" 23x19x4cm, mixed medium

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2025.02.01 19:01 Hot_Swimming3724 Is the interview important?

I‘m an international applicant and I applied for XPD. I just had an virtual interview and I don‘t remember what we talked about for 12 minutes.. I feel something bad.. haaaaaah
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2025.02.01 19:01 sharewithme Word of The Hour: réussi

réussi translates to successful
––––––––––––
See previous words @ https://wordofthehour.org/past
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2025.02.01 19:01 Bowieblackstarflower US states ME

If you remember more than 50 states, have you ever visited one of the missing states? Known someone who lived there?
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2025.02.01 19:01 Sweet_Ad1925 Diet, Exercise, Defeat, Repeat

I have had signs of POTS my entire life. Passing out, low blood pressure, high heart rate, etc etc etc. Fast forward to last year, I got diagnosed. I am currently on the mend to be able to take walks, manage my symptoms, etc. I need to lose weight (i’ve already lost 100lbs over the last couple years which I think made it worse) and every single time I eat healthier (even adding salt) my heart rate is better but adding exercise makes me exhausted!!!!! for days on end. I haven’t exercised in roughly 6 days. Been fatigued, had a period and super dizzy for days. I feel upset because I feel like I am stuck. I didn’t realize losing weight could up my symptoms or make me this fatigued, to where it takes me days to recover. I am 100% not used to this. Does anyone else experience this? Is this common?
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2025.02.01 19:01 abhilash512 Need these type of video

https://m.youtube.com/@WrestleBreakdown/shorts
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2025.02.01 19:01 SadCap9 Dating

I'm dating a Scorpio woman and I'm Aquarius. She's moody sometimes and sometimes bipolar. Is this normal. I'm very understanding but I'm just wondering if this happens to everyone.
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2025.02.01 19:01 magnumpineapple Strawberry Matcha inspired styling

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2025.02.01 19:01 salsabuffalo Dialga raid 249858329264

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2025.02.01 19:01 DarkwyndPT Playing Rise of the Tomb Raider

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2025.02.01 19:01 Sad-Dot8531 Denial is a river

So crazy how ppl r still in denial. This dude is pushing 30 and truthfully pulls girls crazy…He was gonna have a kid sooner or later..
On her ig she posted a pic of the ultrasound with an estimated date of delivery 8/4/24 and the kid was born late July. Which lines up to when he cancelled Osheaga and Lolla that summer.
All the proof is right there.
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2025.02.01 19:01 Puzzleheaded-Cost197 I hope he won't ask me to put his name on my research paper

I hope he won't ask me to put his name on my research paper He was singing and went to sleep. Not sure if he is the best study partner to be honest.
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2025.02.01 19:01 CollapsingTheWave Was the deadly crash in Brussels (1961) the same team of those that perished in this most recent flight on runway __33__ ? I smell a ritualistic sacrifice...

Was the deadly crash in Brussels (1961) the same team of those that perished in this most recent flight on runway __33__ ? I smell a ritualistic sacrifice... submitted by CollapsingTheWave to ObscureAncientSects [link] [comments]


2025.02.01 19:01 Diligent_Border7724 Where to buy margiela tabis in Saigon ? Reps

Thank you
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2025.02.01 19:01 NationalAnything1547 Toronto Model Girl Dancing in Bikini

Toronto Model Girl Dancing in Bikini submitted by NationalAnything1547 to TorontoModels [link] [comments]


2025.02.01 19:01 thedogthatdothings "I wonder how many worlds you damned to extinction to fall this far"

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2025.02.01 19:01 b5555555556 Isso não é so um jogo normal

Isso não é so um jogo normal submitted by b5555555556 to andreyoung [link] [comments]


2025.02.01 19:01 Towel-Prudent Lumon, is that you?

Lumon, is that you? https://preview.redd.it/no7ejzu1skge1.jpg?width=749&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=65a464239713b3f931994a2fec98dd40a9176c77
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2025.02.01 19:01 AutoModerator Lives Todo Sábado!

twitch.tv/arte_da_vida
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2025.02.01 19:01 orincoro New context. Same facts.

Hi alll, no book spoilers please and thanks. 🙏🏼
Today’s wacko theory is that the silo is not in fact on Earth 352+ years in the future.
Instead, the silo is on present day earth (let’s say 50 years from now), and the silo residents aren’t born and raised there. They’ve been kidnapped from their present day lives, and made to take part in a brutal game show. Let’s look at a few facts we know in this new context.
:

What if the memory loss drugs are real, but they are used before people ever reach the silo? What if they’ve been used more than once? What if the gas is only a an emergency measure in case the population finds out?m and the memory drugs stop working? The memory drug the old lady takes might be an antidote, given to comfort her.
I know it’s most likely all nonsense, but I am liking my theory.
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2025.02.01 19:01 combonickel55 Pelosi lost another campaign- within her own party

She opposed Martin, a progressive, as DNC chair, and endorsed Wikler, a moderate, supported by the big money donors as well as Schumer, Peolsi's closest competition for greatest responsibility for destroying what was once the people's party.
Can this please, please, please be the beginning of the end of the death grip the centrist, pro-corporate, pro-Wall Street ghouls have on what should be the party of the working class?
It is past time for Pelosi and Schumer to shut up and move to the back of the line. It's time for new leadership.
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2025.02.01 19:01 Ur_Anemone ‘Are we dating the same guy?’: Women turn to Facebook to uncover cheating and violence

‘Are we dating the same guy?’: Women turn to Facebook to uncover cheating and violence Experts say use of groups to warn others about dangerous men is indictment on governments’ failure to keep women safe…
TLDR: The article highlights the benefits and risks of “Are We Dating the Same Guy?” groups. While they help women expose cheaters and abusers and provide mutual support, they also raise concerns about privacy breaches, defamation risks, and potential retaliation from men named in the posts. Experts see these groups as a reflection of systemic failures to protect women, forcing them to rely on each other for safety. Despite the risks, many view the groups as a necessary alternative in a flawed justice system, celebrating the solidarity and protection they offer.
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2025.02.01 19:01 AutoModerator Men's Polo Association Shoes

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